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Dad's Fight with Stage 4 -brain met

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I just lost my dad on November 17th. He should have had more time. One more Christmas. Please, for anyone who has a loved one with brain cancer, or in my dads case a brain metastasis, watch for these signs.

Especially if they’ve had successful treatment for breast cancer, lung cancer, ovarian cancer and at the time of surgery and lymph nodes were involved. Even a little - I can’t offer this advice with enough heartfelt prayers and broken heart.

If your family sees any first signs of balance or slight studder mid thought/ sentence, walks in a veer at any time rather than a typical straight motion, no matter how good he may feel, please notify his oncologist immediately. Also call his primary if ya’ll don’t get immediate instructions or call back from his oncology team. If it metastasizes it will be to the brain. Lungs will be clear, can be and remain clear for 3-6 months, etc. the cancer no longer cares where it came from. The malignant neoplasms aren’t visible as a brain met/ tumor until it’s made it’s home.

Please be vigilant. We just lost my dad last week. He was cancer free after Lung surgery and a long brutal chemo cocktail, then went back to work. Didn’t mention he had mild headaches bc of the nerve damage, etc. from the radiation.

Then he and my mom were driving home from a visit with my Uncle and she suddenly had to grab the steering wheel. It was a 5-7 second slow veer. But we missed the first one. This was a difference of less than 10 days in time till realizing something was wrong and calling his oncologist. As soon as my mom told them what happened they had her rush him over for an MRI and our lives changed forever with the brain met diagnosis survival rates combined with WBRT. He was so strong while kicking that tumors butt. He was back home less than 24 hours after the first surgery. Just 2.5 months ago all scans of head and chest were clear with no visible cancer. (We knew that only meant cherished time, not full remission) He repainted the interior of my parents house. He felt good and alive and wanted to continue home improvements. It was a sight to see. Then another lingering headache came but my dad thought he had tweaked his neck while painting the ceiling molding. He had that lingering headache for several days before he even asked for an aspirin. But in that short time the 2nd tumor had come back bigger than the first but was also removed successfully but this time he didn’t walk out of the hospital and couldn’t keep his appetite p enough to sustain his body. He would eat all day but something with the chemo cocktail destroyed his bodies ability to process or burn protein so it ate away at every muscle in his body until there was nothing left.

2 brain surgeries later neither the lung cancer or an actual regrowth of a third tumor killed him.

The 16 whole brain radiation treatments he had in 2016 started to take their toll with late onset side effects around the same time of his second brain surgery and we lost him two months later. That in combination with a recent diagnosis of “extreme vitamin nutrient difficiency due to metastasis” he rapidly lost all muscle mass and strength. He was starving to death in front of us as we were helpless to do anything but keep him as comfortable as possible. He was conscience until Nov. 7th. He took his last breath 10 days later.

Keep hope up though! I let everyone console my “denial” and after a while didn’t care, I just cared that I believed he could beat it. It takes many opinions and views of immediate family to make a loved ones end of life what your loved one wanted it to be.

Our story isn’t a happy one, and the reason I want to share with so much detail is that I believe these days from the balance & headaches creeping up till new scans, detection, and removal were 2 delays of just a few days, but where he may have missed his shot at a longer life, more time, (he had already outlived his survival expectancy by almost 8 months) and another year or 2 would have been a happy ending. He was only 68. Men can be stubborn and people fighting cancer don’t want to burden or stir things up or maybe it’s the fear that holds them back from saying anything about a new ache or twinge for the first few days. But malignant cancer is scary smart especially once it’s in the brain. Malignant cancer uses those few days of fear to destroy its victim. It’s relentless.

Be vigilant, be a nagger if you have to, upset somebody a little, urge, spur, help encourage whoever the closest loved on is to be okay with pulling him or her up off the couch or interrupt a favorite show and get them in the car and to the oncologist that day. Don’t wait till the next. Help with transport, to & from. Or just clean the kitchen or wash a load of clothes while they’re at an appt. If there are personal matters or a work schedule that interferes or delays that visit, be the one that takes them to the appointment.

We will mourn and honor, love, and miss him forever. But we will never forget how quickly it ravaged him.

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There is nothing that prepares a person for giving end of life care to their parent/ grandparent. By far the hardest most heart breaking and guilt riddled time of my life. Of all our lives.

My mom is taking such tender care of my dad. Cade is taking over the majority of time at their house so my mom can rest. Then me & Colby relieve Cade so he can take a break, come home for a day and rest, etc.

In home hospice is taking its toll, but none of us are willing to have him anywhere else.

Please pray for our family and for my daddy.

My dad, he will forget things. And ask “when is my next doctors appointment?” Then my mom has to tell him that he’s in hospice care now all over again. This upsets him. It breaks my heart.

Hi friends, 

As some of you know my parents (Bruce & Loretta Brown) found out in October of this year that my dad's cancer had spread and metastasized to his brain. 

4 days later he underwent brain surgery, and removal of the tumor was successful. The then underwent 14 rounds of whole  brain radiation treatments followed by 2 targeted radiation treatments. 
 
He completed his radiation treatments a little over a month ago and from there, the waiting game began.

Follow up CT scan is scheduled for March, unless any new issues, difficulties, or symptoms arise. They have.

He needs to go to the doctor with each new or recurring symptom but his oncologist would want to do another CT Scan.

They just can't afford it. Co- pays and premiums for Surgery in late 2015. Chemo, Stealth MRI's, CT Scans, Brain surgery, and 16 total radiation treatments in 2016 have completely drained them financially. 

Dads reflux issues have progressed from occasional difficulty swallowing to almost constant. He feels like there's just something in the way there. He hasn't been able to keep most bigger meals down. He's back down to 117 lbs. He was back up to almost 125.

The dizziness is awful, he loses his balance and falls, but gets right back up. His arms and elbows are bruised and scrapped from catching himself against the walls, or the floor.

Showering for some reason sends him into a bit of a tail spin. He describes it as a weight coming out of nowhere and yanking his head down. He continued having  heachaches after his brain surgery, but now they are a different.
 
We need to know what all this is.  Odds are he is missing out on precious time where his doctors have a chance to treat or be as proactive as possible with whatever is coming his way, and where my dad has the chance to continue fighting.

Some of these things his doctor wanted to address before the brain met was found, some have become more bothersome over this last month. Some are things he needed to be seeing the doctor for 2 weeks ago.

Right now my dad needs 3 things:

1.) He needs to get back in to see his regular doctor for a referral to a gastrointestinal specialist for a Colonoscopy & Endoscopy.  (He's having severe trouble swallowing - this has worsened from occasional to just about every swallow.)

2.) He needs to be able to see his Oncologist so my mom can update her on how my dad is feeling and how the dizziness and some headaches are recurring.

3.) CT scan now, instead of waiting until March.
 
I have no idea what might come after a CT scan, but, I know my mom needs to get him into all 3 as soon as possible. 

I don't know how to sit by and watch my dad possibly succumb to this cancer, just because they can't afford the cost of deductibles, co-pays, doctor visits, follow up tests, treatments and a mortgage right now.  So I put together a gofundme campaign for my mom for my dad. 

My dad, has kicked BUTT every step of the way through this fight. He has just the right amount of stubborn combined with a very strong will to survive.

He SHOULD have been hospitalized for 1-2 weeks after Brain surgery. He woke up joking with the ICU team. He was released the VERY NEXT DAY.

14 rounds of whole brain radiation therapy (WBRT) plus 2 very strong targeted radiation treatments SHOULD have had my dad in bed, becoming more incoherent, lethargic, sleeping most of the day. quite frankly, it could have killed him.

This man was up piddling around the house - painting wall trim, and then painting interior doors. My mom was trying to hide ladders from him, because he felt okay enough enough to piddle around but it took his mind off everything.

He has fought so dang hard. I can't explain how heart breaking it is to realize that every day he has to wait to  see any of his doctors is another day the cancer has a shot.

They've handled all the costs up until now. The operation, the chemo cocktails, the hospitalizations and blood transfusions during chemo, the brain surgery, the scans,  stealth MRI's, the $1500 co-pay PER radiation treatment, etc.

Now on a fixed income - His company finally had to let him go on Jan 1., Obviously unable to work and my mom being his caregiver, the medical bills, co-payments and deductibles have simply just overwhelmed them.  He had AFLAC, which helped so much last year. My mom is trying to look into keeping those premiums up. I helped my dad apply for disability in October, but he was denied. We are appealing.  

In the meantime, if anyone is able to help and moved to do so, every single dollar will help tremendously.

The funds go straight to my mom, Loretta Brown and will be used for my dad’s co-payments and deductibles up until his annual out of pocket expenses are met

Prayers, suggestions, well wishes, and advice are also very much welcomed.

Please consider helping my dad continue on with his fight with cancer. Please share. Please, please continue to pray.

Organizer and beneficiary

Sherry Dixon
Organizer
Arlington, TX
Loretta Brown
Beneficiary

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